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Columns

Somnambulist or crawler – know what are you when others sleep

Uma Ram

This viral video on WhatsApp was forwarded to me the 15th time this week. Though no can stop laughing watching it, the thought process behind it calls for much consideration.

A wife trying to unlock her husband’s android trying passwords and pattern locks, does all she can to get her the prints of her husband’s fingers and toes too, all while the husband is fast asleep. Finally when she tries his face recognition and he wakes up due to the disturbances she crawls away like a reptile. The husband who had pretended to sleep all along wakes up and unlocks his mobile with his puppy’s paw mark.

No normal human being can resist the laughter on watching the entire clipping. But the pathetic plight of such spouses, especially the wives is something not pitiable but serious one too.

Another video features a father rushing home on his bike dashing against everyone and everything on his way with cuts and bruises all over his body after his kid calls up to says that their mother had unlocked his android. It was the best timely comedy of its category but is equally thought-provoking.

When shared on our friends group we had uncontrollable laughter as many confessed they hardly sleep during night. They pretend to sleep and wait for their husband to fall into deep sleep till around 2am and then wake up to check the android for any misbehaviors.

One of them had made it a habit to set an alarm on vibration mode placed under her pillow, so that the wakeup call did not wake him up and she then could check his mobile. Worst was that when she had seen his chats he had gone wild and indulged in domestic violence fracturing her leg.

But the true comedy about it is that these husbands too stay awake to ensure that their wives don’t fiddle with their mobiles. In fact they too pretend sleeping and many a time have caught their wives red handed and fights broke out at even the odd hours of 2.30 am.

The embarrassing fact is that kids come to know of the intimate problems and sometimes in apartments the worst is neighbours too become aware of it. Another viral joke on WhatsApp revolves around such an embarrassing situation when the wife catches the husband red handed when she sees his chats and controversial photographs and the fight breaks out at 3am when their neighbour interferes to compose them. He takes him aside and advises him not to correct himself but suggests him acoustic treatment for his bedroom just like how he has done.

It leaves people wonder where is the world heading towards and where have the romantic days gone when the couple used to stay awake for their privacy waiting for the kids to sleep. Or those telepathic moments of perfect harmony between the couple that awakened the spouse even without disturbances when the partner was awake.

In this Internet era the wife stays awake to inspect the husband’s behaviour and the husband stays awake to escape. In some cases it is the other way round. More safe and time saving are the `spywares’ designed as a safety tool basically to the track family’s whereabouts ans also track browsing habits.

What is that which triggers this so called suspicion? Check out for the following symptoms

Is your spouse spending more time on the mobile than with you or kids

Has the frequency of your intimate moments reduced

Do they prefer solitude and have become more reserved

Have their social behaviour altered by staying aloof from family, friends, relatives and society at-large.

Do they suspect you

Has your frequency of family outings gone down

Does your spouse avoid even talking or spending time with you or even your kids.

Are their mobiles or gadgets locked with security codes

If not locked do they erase the browsing history

Do they get irritated for no reason

Have their eating habits, patterns, frequency or variety of foods changed

Do they spend more time than before in front of mirrors

Do they consider you as their competitor or burden

Do they give more importance for their progress than even kids

Do they hinder your progress too

Do they try to learn something new like a sport, art etc

Do they keep pulling down your feet in front of others

Above all has their bedtime changed

Do they stay awake till late hours on gadgets

Are you are not aware of their bedtime and wake up time

If the answer is a yes for most of the above listed then please do not jump into conclusions of an extramarital affair. Surfing adult sites, a no ties chat, adult virtual games etc are some of the vices that have enslaved people today because of the stressful job profiles, sparing no time or energy for the basic needs life calls for. Not all necessarily be that crooked minded to commit adultery in reality as such. Psychiatrists attribute various reasons for such behaviours.

Mid life crisis – a self-assessment of age and capabilities

As stress busters

Curiosity

Self booster to cope with their shortcomings

A revenging attitude due to frictions in relationships

This staying awake to watch over your spouse is not going to change the scenario. Instead you are only going to end up in frustration spoiling your health along with an already hurt mind. Concentrate on self improvement both physically and mentally. Life is all about winning over again and again. Remember when nothing is permanent in this life even such weird situations cannot last long and are sure to change in your favour some day. Stay positive – sleep well.

Disclaimer: The views expressed above are the author’s own.

(The author of the column is Uma Ram, freelance writer from Coimbatore)

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