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16 Apr 2024, Edition - 3199, Tuesday

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Some New Year Resolutions that never see the light of day

Indrani Thakurata


Bengaluru : MTV’s New Year’s ‘Resolutions for White Guys’ has gone viral. It has garnered abuse for its racist attacks on them. Slammed as ‘Racist,’ ‘Disgusting’, many have raised counter questions on their stand.“Funny that MTV makes a video telling white guys to stop being racist yet it took them almost a decade to show black musicians on…” Even New Year resolutions have the potential to create news, stir controversy. But we are a peaceful lot, looking forward to the New Year with hopes, dreams in our eyes and cash in our pockets. We don’t take ourselves too seriously,(how can we? When the government doesn’t take us seriously?) and for sure don’t take New year resolutions too seriously either. So, when we bumped into a web page doling out datas on how many Americans make New Year Resolutions, how many don’t-we flipped.

We want to laugh while we pledge to abide by our ‘self made rules’ and laugh a little more when we break them eventually. ‘My goal for 2017 is to accomplish the goals of 2016, which I should have done in 2015, because I promised them in 2014 and planned them in 2013’ sums up our thoughts on resolutions.

Common Carryforwards that will crack you up

1. I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses: We are all guilty of this. We don’t innovate when we have to take leaves, we go with the same old.
2. I will stop sending e-mails to my wife: Ah! Blame it on technology. We talk less, whatsapp more.
3. I will think of a password other than “password” or “hello”: What’s the use of a most predictable password? Duh!
4. I will stop considering other people’s feelings when they so obviously don’t consider mine–if you stink, I will say so! : Most metro rides are all about controlling your feelings.
5. Will do less laundry and use more deodorant: Be prepared to face the above mentioned if you are lazy

On a serious note, according to Finance Survey ‘Save More, Spend Less’ Is 2017’s Top New Year’s Resolution. And given that our country has gone cashless, no cash in our pockets, no cash in ATMs and no cash in banks; we can only resolute to deal with our cash better in the coming year.

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