October 29, 2018
Relationships can be hard, but what is even harder is being stuck in the wrong relationship, without actually realising why or how it is wrong for you. Looking at a situation that we ourselves are in objectively, often deems to be elusive. You might be unhappy or dissatisfied in your relationship or with your partner, but most of us tend to brush these things off as temporary or just passing phases. However, that is not always the case. It is important to understand the difference between what may be habitual and what might be arising as a result of a specific situation. There are a few things that serve as relationship red flags. If you face too many of these, it might be time to have a serious talk with your partner – and if that fails, reconsider your relationship.
1. You cannot voice your opinion
It’s one thing when you’re slightly shy in the beginning to say exactly what’s on your mind, it’s another when after months or years of being together, you realise that your opinion will always be shunted. Your relationship should feel like a safe space where you can say how you feel and think without fear of judgement or without having to worry about whether or not your point of view will be taken into account. If what you think is always considered less important than your partner’s, it definitely isn’t right. Have a talk with your partner and make them understand why this is particularly bothersome. If a solution seems far fetched, this red flag should be taken seriously.
2. He/She has an issue with all your family members and friends
When your partner doesn’t like a particular person that you might be close to, it is understandable. After all, you are two individuals and all your likes and dislikes can never be the same. But when it is a general feeling towards everyone you’re close to, it indicates more than just a disliking. Perhaps your partner is unhappy sharing you with anyone else, which shows possessiveness. In the long run, it isn’t a quality that will help sustain your relationship.
3. Your future plans are far from being on the same page
If you’ve got a five year plan that includes getting married and having babies and the only plan he has is a five month plan which includes a summer vacation with you in it, you know you’re not on the same page. While we often let these things go because of how much fun we might be having in the moment, it eventually causes distress when addressed. If you have an idea that the two of you want different things from life, have a talk to come to a consensus and if that doesn’t work, perhaps reconsider the relationship.