April 26, 2018
I am 27. A friend of mine recently pointed out to me that he moved out out of his house when he was 19. His point? Oh nothing, just that maybe at 27 I should think about getting a place on rent for myself. You know, as many people of my age do. Of course, their reasons are varied: some studied outside their home town and then never had the will to return, some need more space in their lives and therefore prefer staying alone, some got jobs away from home and only visit home once a month.
Of course, all these reasons very legitimate and relevant. They are practical concerns that we all face, and the millennial generation is particularly keen on ‘finding their own space and persona’. And somehow, staying in the same house as your parents just doesn’t fit into that scheme of things.
But not me. I have made a conscious choice to live in a house with my family. And though many many not understand them, my reasons are as legitimate as the next person’s.
In the west, it’s a culture – the little birds leave the mother’s nest and fend for themselves. In India, this wasn’t a cultural thing for the longest time. Because the dynamics of a family were so different. Symbiotically, it was a family in the true essence.
I have a room of my own in my house. I get all the space I need when I want. I don’t face the kind of restrictions I agree many still face. And that is an edge, for sure.
But my choice of live with my family stems from my need to spend as much time as I can with the people who have raised me, my parents. For me, it’s as practical as it is emotional. I know that my parents are getting old; I know that my parents will not be with me forever. And therefore, it is essential for me to spend as much time with my family as I can at the moment. Because I have realised that like everything else in life, this too is transient.
Tomorrow, if something happens to me or anyone in my family, I am eliminating the circumstance where I won’t be present.
Am I more adjusting? Maybe. Am I what people call ‘mature’? I don’t know.
But I do know that I am making the right call from myself. And that’s enough.